who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
My mom asked what the mark on my neck was - I told her I burned it with a straightener.
She believed that the monsterous hickey on your neck was a burn?
well, not really. but then i reminded her that my sister has yet to take that pregnancy test and she conviniently forgot about my hickey
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Randomize