So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
