Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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