I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
