Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
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