i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
