Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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