What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Randomize
