I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
My liver just had a heart attack.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize
