Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I would ride that face into the sunset
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
Randomize
