I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
