you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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