it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
