Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize
