Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
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