Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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