Define "chronic" masturbator.
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
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