My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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