the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
