Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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