so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
