There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
