Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
