Well apparently he's into motor boating.
No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
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