i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Randomize
