I bet he comes in French.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
