"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
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