i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
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