forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
