Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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