i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
