I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
