my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
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