i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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