I heard we made out
Can i not drive my cunt home
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
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