I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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