called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
You need a sexual gate keeper
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Randomize
