I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
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