I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
She needs sedatives and a leash
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
