i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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