Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
