I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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