I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
