Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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