Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Randomize
