Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
