:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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