If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
