yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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