"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Randomize