Bisexual people are plain selfish.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Randomize
