I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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