Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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